5 STEPS TO SELF-LOVE
There can be much confusion centered around self-love and caring for yourself.
I personally have been confused about this; thinking that if I put myself first, or if I focused on self love, that this was a bad thing…that our focus should always be on helping other people…that we should put others needs before our own.
I’ve come to realize that there is large difference between between self-love and being self centered.
This can be a confusing concept.
I’ve found that self-love, is not something that I can intellectually wrap my head around…but rather truly feel from the inside. Feel it with my heart.
There is a big difference between self-love and an ego trip.
I’m sure you've seen the people...the ones who just love to be the center of attention…they thrive on it...they are “me me me” oriented.
I always thought that a person like this had a lot of "self-love"...this is where I was confused...this is not "self-love" this is a huge ego.
Self-love is not about being the center of attention.
It's not about getting everything that you want.
Self-love is not about thinking everyone should be doing what you want them to do.
It is about truly caring for yourself.
It is about completely loving yourself unconditionally.
So what does this mean?
In my opinion, it means loving yourself regardless of the mistakes you make. It means truly loving you for who you are. All the wonderful qualities that make up you.
So let’s say for example, you have set the goal of losing weight….but you didn’t lose the weight.
It means loving yourself just as much at that point, as you will when you do lose the weight.
Now, this doesn’t mean you won't be disappointed that you didn't hit your goal.
What it means is that you never stop loving you.
It means loving yourself regardless of the outcome.
It means loving yourself when you do something great; it means loving yourself when you don’t do the right thing.
We can be harder on ourselves, than on anyone else.
Sometimes we have a tendency to give others more slack or leeway than we ever give ourselves.
We may encourage our friends and family, forgiving them when things go wrong, or if they mess up…but often times, we fail to give ourselves the same respect in return.
We need to treat ourselves just like we would our best friend.
The truth is, that if we are not there for ourselves…if we do not take time to truly love ourselves, we cannot be there fully for the people that we love and care about.
There are 5 things that I've found to practice regularly to help me with self-love.
1. Be Grateful.
When I first wake up in the morning, I immediately think of 3 things that I am grateful for. This always sets my mind in the right direction for the day.
2. Do Not Compare Yourself to Others.
This can be a hard one....especially with social media…there are pictures and posts constantly that we are seeing.
But the key is, to focus on you..focus on loving yourself for where you've been, where you are, and where you are going.
3. Take 5-10 Minutes of Daily Quiet Time.
Take time each day to sit quietly and clear your mind.
By doing this regularly, I have found that it makes it easier to think clearly and to listen to my inner voice.
4. Set Boundaries for Yourself.
Identify what is and isn’t good for you.
We get to choose what we tolerate in our lives.
If someone is treating you in a way that is not good for you…don’t tolerate it. Surround yourself with the people who make you feel good about you.
5. Give Yourself A Break.
We can be so busy, and constantly moving from task to task, that we get lost in the long list of to do’s and action steps.
Give yourself a break…take time to do the things that make you feel good about you. If that is exercise for you...go exercise…if that is loving on your pet…go love on your pet…if that is journaling….go journal…if that is spending time with friends…go spend time with friends.
Whatever it is that rejuvenates you…take time to do that...and go do it.
Self-love is a process…it is a journey…it is something that is developed over time.
It is truly getting to know and understand yourself.
It's a relationship...the one that you have with you.
Fall more in love with you.
The more you have self-love, the more you treat yourself with the love and respect you deserve…the more love and wonderful things will come into your life.
This is your life...this is your journey...live it fully!